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Pages from the Secret Diary of A Housewife

the secret diary of a housewife

–Today we celebrated our 25th wedding anniversary. The champagne, food, desserts everything was awesome. But the anniversary sex was disappointing as usual. He locked himself in the bathroom and cried for hours and I don’t know what to say!

— He walked up to me and revealed his big black secret. “I am impotent,” he said. In my mind, I replied, “I knew!” How can I not notice that?

 

— A woman has needs. I met a guy in a party and fantasized about him all day long. My husband is in the office and I can’t stop thinking about this guy. I love my husband and the guilt is killing me. Yet I can’t stop the fantasies.  

 

— My friend told me about this drug called Viagra that can solve our problem. She said this magic pill can make things as steamy as our wedding night. I replaced his Prozac with Viagra. I hope this will lift something other than his mood.

 

— It was absolute bliss! I had the best sex of my life. Can’t explain the feeling but it was the best thing that ever happened to me!

— Life has become a blessing. It’s difficult to write while he’s doing that.

— He turns everything dirty! Yesterday the burger king manager asked me if I’d like a Whopper. My husband said, “She has a whopper.” It was embarrassing!!! But at least the sex is good!

 

— I think he took too many pills over the weekend. Yesterday, instead of mowing the lawn, he was using his pecker as a weed whacker. It’s insane. He is going crazy!

–I’m all sored down there. No time to write the details. He might catch me.

— Damn! I’m hiding. A girl can only take so much. He’s washing the Viagra down with neat whisky! I can’t take that thing anymore. It’s my karma taking on me!

 

— I’m screwed to death. It’s like living with a Black and Decker drill. I am glued to the bed. My body aches, my armpits hurt and my legs are paining. He’s a pig!!

— God please turn him into a gay. I’ve stopped wearing make-up, stopped my skin-caring regime and everything in self-care. He still keeps pouncing on me! Even yawning has become dangerous. God, please save me!

 

— Every time I shut my eyes, I get surprise attack! It’s like going to bed with a scud missile. I can hardly walk. I think I’ll kill the bastard.

— I’ve done everything to turn him off. Nothing is working. I even started dressing like a nun but this just seems to make him horny. God, please save me!

— I will kill him. My pet cat and dog are also scared of him. They won’t go near him. Our friends stopped coming over. Last night I told him to go and fuck himself and the pervert did it.

— The bastard has started to complain about headaches. I hope he explodes. I told him to stop using Viagra and go back on Prozac.

— He switched the pills but it doesn’t seem to make any difference……Christ!!! here he comes again.

— He’s back on Prozac. Now, the lazy sod just sits there in front of the TV all day and expects me to do everything for him. This is much better than the nightmare I have been through!!!

 

Last week, my cousin visited us. And I opened up to her. She immediately browsed the internet and ordered a bottle of BRIHATRI Ashwagandhadi Lehya from Ayurcentralonline. I got curious, what was this thing she was so sure of.

 

She explained that BRIHATRI Ashwagandhadi Lehya is herbal magic. It would not only treat his depression but also bring him back to normal activities. It is an immune-booster and stamina builder. BRIHATRI Ashwagandhadi Lehya is one simple solution to a myriad of problems. My cousin credited the spark in her relation to BRIHATRI Ashwagandhadi Lehya

 

3 days later, I got a prompt delivery. And I bet BRIHATRI Ashwagandhadi Lehya is the best thing that has ever happened to me!!!

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