Mental illness unlike a physical wound drags one through the darkest of tunnels filled with scariest thoughts and aghast fears without giving even the slightest hint to the outside world.
Today, when I look back into that daunting space of darkness I feel sometimes it’s the little things that we hear as a child and believe with all innocence cause much deeper impact than ever intended.
For me it all started pretty early in my childhood when my parents used the most common way of getting things done from a child; telling stories of the spooky ghosts and wicked monsters.
The fear got deeply planted in my heart so much that I never slept alone or stepped in darker rooms or went to the loo at night. The fear took another turn when I had to step out of my parent’s cocoon for pursuing further studies.
The new start of my independent life came to a crashing halt as I was smacked down to pieces with the worst of my fears stuck to my face. Everything shattered in a split second when one day I came back to see my roommate hung to the ceiling.
The very sight took my words away as I stood there gasping for some air. Days passed, months rolled and even a year went by, but I sit still wide awake all night long drenched in sweat and clenched by fear. My grades sloped down pathetically, my body felt exhausted, the heart raced through the beats yet there was plain silence on my face.
Burying all the fear and anxiety deep within, I started to get spontaneous panic attack and anxiety issues. That’s when I decide to confide in an expert!
I went to my Ayurvedic doctor, who also treated me for irregular menstruation and opened up about all the things messing with my head. The very feel of splitting the words took the load off my chest making me relieved and calm.
The doctor counselled me and prescribed Mentace tablet for 3 months. The medicines worked amazing in calming my senses and relaxing my anxiety issues and for the deep-rooted fear I went through a course of counselling that finally freed me from the curse.
Many times harm is done without intending to harm, so it’s very important to be more cautious to check what we plant in a child’s head !